I DON’T FEEL AT HOME IN THIS WORLD ANYMORE [2017 / NETFLIX]

A film about kindness. More specifically, a film about the intrinsic relationship between kindness and the plaque of depression that infects contemporary America. How do we show kindness to others when they refuse to show it to us? How do we show kindness when all we feel is despair? Is anger only the antithesis of kindness, or can it be harnessed as a force of internal nature and ridden into adventures that unlock the joy from which kindness will spring? Can we throw a stranger onto the back of the same horse of rage and turn them into a friend?

No matter what the answer to these questions; which drive the narrative of ‘I Don’t Feel at Home in This World Anymore’ on as many rollercoaster turns as a proper old fashioned American mood swing should; depression may still remain. An acquaintance who grew up in a war torn country once described white Americans as “people who do not know how to suffer.” Is it true? Contemporary baby fits from covid deniers point at yes. Are these babies depressed? Opioid addiction definitely wants to chime in on this subject. Do these babies throw tantrums that appeal to other babies as a noble rage worth joining in on? You know it does. What about the depression inside the heart of a goth? Is it more noble than MAGA depression? Who cares, it definitely is more poetic! Art is one of the pure joys that keeps the world worth participating in, even as the gears are covered in the tears cried by big fucking babies. Harsh truth is, conservatives tend to suck at poetry. Ultimately this sense of poetry is the line in the sand that ‘I Don’t Feel at Home in This World Anymore’ draws, separating the depression and rage of its protagonists from a world filled with shit head conservatives. The myriad of existential questions that plague both us the viewer and the film’s leads are transformed into friendship building adventure because they embrace fantasy. Yes, they still suffer at the end, but now they know how.

‘I Don’t Feel at Home in This World Anymore’ streaming on Netflix.